scenes from Palawan weekender

Much to our surprise and dismay, our flight was delayed for almost half the day. We were stuck in the Philippine Airlines plane for almost two hours. The crew only let the people out when it was lunchtime (free meals). So this is what budget flights are all about now huh? tsk tsk.

Microtel Palawan is the best place to get away from the city. You'll really feel isolated coz its far from everything (no nearby stores whatsoever). The resort however is still under construction the time we went. Beware of local insects too like "niknik". Niknik bites can be cured by Wings detergent so be sure to bring a pack along. The beach of the hotel was also too shallow, and "bakawan" like. but its perfect for dramaramas.

We didn't get to explore Puerto Princesa coz there's a typhoon, too bad, maybe next time. :D

very random shots

Microtel Palawan
May 29-31

Forwarded Messages

Morning starter...typed as is:

A speaker started his speech by holding up a $20 bill.

He asked: "Who wants this $20?"

Hands started going up.

He crumpled the bill, dropped it to the floor, and ground it with his shoe. He picked it up and asked,

"Now who still wants this?"

Everybody's hand was still up.

"My friends," he said. "let this be a lesson. Others may trample upon you, but they can never diminish your true value."

A great morning to those finding it hard to smile. :D

-------------------

There will come a point in your life when you'll get tired of chasing everyone, trying to fix everything. It's not giving up, its just a realization that you don't need certain people and all their freakin drama.


-------------------

You have to learn that sometimes it isn't love. It's just a feeling. A sudden feeling and you just overreacted...

summer fling.durog.hehe

-------------------

There will always be that first true love.
The one you first spent the night crying for.
The one that never really worked out but you kept your hopes up too much.
The one who got away.
The one who taught you the things you need to know about love.
The one that you still look back to whenever you try to love again.

And now... I seriously need to pack...haha

disabled

Love is not a feeling...it's an ability - from the movie Dan in Real Life

Everytime I try something, I am surprised that I can do it, when before I thought I couldn't (i.e. billiards, news writing, zip line...etc)...

but love... still remains a feeling...

I have to stop and take Propanolol now...

last article

my last article in my former work (<--click):

Vol. XXII, No. 204
Wednesday, May 20, 2009 | MANILA, PHILIPPINES
Today’s Headlines

Repeat of power crisis inevitable?
FOCUS

BY MOST ACCOUNTS, the Philippines will sooner or later have to contend with another power crisis, with demand for electricity expected to soon outpace supply as the economy continues to expand despite a global recession.

The Visayas, particularly Negros and Panay, is already experiencing blackouts. The situation in Luzon and Mindanao was supposed to reach a critical point this year and the next, respectively. Fortunately, the downturn has provided some breathing space, slowing demand and delaying the supply crunch.

Energy department estimates have showed electricity demand growing at an annual 4.4% from 2008 to 2017 — by 4.4 % in Luzon, 4.6 % in Visayas, and 4.3 % in Mindanao.

The projections placed the "critical period" for Luzon in 2010 when dependable power supply would be unable to meet demand at its peak as well as the required reserves. Energy officials have said this could be pushed to 2012 because of the economic downturn.

That study called for 4,100 megawatts (MW) of additional capacity within a 10-year period, in a combination of base load, midrange and peaking plants. Luzon would require an additional 3,000 MW; the Visayas, 500 MW; and Mindanao, 600 MW.

The need to build new power plants is widely acknowledged, but there are various roadblocks. For one, the private sector claims the government must tweak its policies to encourage investment. The global downturn is a double-edged sword, limiting the private sector’s fund-raising capacity.

Public opinion, meanwhile, is often against power plant proponents over environmental and other issues.

Power industry players are also demanding a climate conducive to business.

"[T]he government should keep a level playing field and apply the rules in a consistent manner if it is to attract and optimize investments in the power sector. Maintaining a climate of political and economic stability, while providing needed infrastructure support for big-ticket investments will also be a big help," TeaM Energy, operator of the 1,000-MW Sual and the 700-MW Pagbilao plants, said in an email.

Regulators should shape up, for instance reducing interference in pricing and speeding up the issuance of permits, an Aboitiz Power Corp. official said.

Jose Alejandro, Philippine Chamber of Commerce and Industry vice-president for energy, claimed the local environment has been hostile to investors.

"Somehow, the local environment has painted the distribution utilities and the generation companies vis-a-vis the independent power producers as consumers’ adversaries. Such locally acquired image is quite a liability," he said in an interview.

"All other factors, e.g. interest rates, inflation, peace and order, etc. are standard items that can be overcome for as long as there is a regime of transparency, a level playing field and fairness in the regulatory system," he added.

To expect the government to put up funding to address the looming power crisis is "perhaps just wishful thinking," Asian Institute of Petroleum Studies Inc. executive director Rafael S. Diaz, Jr. observed.

"They are quite busy trying to sell the remaining National Power Corp. (Napocor) plants and therefore only the private sector can invest on new or additional capacities. Unfortunately, with the current economic slowdown, such investments are not coming in fast enough," he said.

Privatization is supposed to arrest the decay of old power plants since new owners can invest for repairs and upgrades. But the government is having difficulties attracting buyers. Early this year the buyer of the Calaca plant in Batangas backed out after finding out that the facility was severely deteriorated, delaying privatization targets.

By law, the state must sell 70% of Napocor’s generating capacity. It currently stands at 57%.

To be fair, the competence of investors can also be a big factor.

"It all depends on the private sector’s ability to build power plants in time to match growing demand," Luis Miguel O. Aboitiz, senior vice-president of Aboitiz Power Corp., said in an e-mail.

"It is important to note that economic cycles are up and down. When growth does return, a tightening power market will occur if no new capacity is built," Aboitiz Power First Vice-President Iker M. Aboitiz said in another e-mail.

The project cycle of a new plant is approximately three years, so any new capacity built today would serve incremental demand three years from now. By then, Mr. Aboitiz said the economic situation may have reversed.

Mr. Diaz noted that a number of baseload plants, or those that cover minimum demand, are already operating with "very low efficiency."

"For example, Ambuklao Hydroelectric has been on zero production while Binga Hydroelectric is operating with very low efficiency," he said.

The 175-megawatt Ambuklao-Binga facility is owned by SN Aboitiz Power Hydro Inc.

Mr. Alejandro said the government must impose a strict and regulated schedule in upgrading capacities so that the system can get an additional 15% to 20% within the next 16 to 24 months.

"Funding would be easier because project viability would be easy to justify and document," he said.

Some investors, meanwhile, are still busy at their drawing boards.

"We are presently studying the possibility of future expansion programs for the Sual and Pagbilao plants. However, nothing is definite at the moment," TeaM Energy said.

The government is pushing renewable energy projects as part of measures to avert a power shortage. Perks such as income tax holidays are being dangled. In February, the Energy department said around $25 billion worth of renewable energy investments are expected over the next two years. Investments could rise to $80 billion in ten years.

The Energy department’s medium-term Renewable Energy Policy Framework aims to develop more than 4,000 MW of additional renewable energy capacity.

But department officials themselves admit that renewable energy won’t be sufficient to meet demand, at least for now, and what’s needed are conventional power plants running on coal to meet just baseload demand.

The Energy department has proposed the immediate revival of the old 600-MW Sucat Plant in Parañaque. For the long term, Energy Secretary Angelo T. Reyes wants nuclear power harnessed.

The only new power plants going up include the proposed 200-MW coal plant in Sarangani of Conal Holdings Co., a $450-million joint venture between the Alcantaras and a Thai investor; and the 42.5-MW Sibulan hydroelectric power project in Davao del Sur worth P5 billion. The Conal project is being hounded by critics.

Cebu Energy Development Corp., a consortium of Global Business Power Corp., Formosa Heavy Industries and Abovant Holdings (a joint venture of Aboitiz Power and Vivant Corp.)., is building a 246-MW coal facility in Toledo, Cebu. The first of the three 82-MW coal plants will be completed in March 2010. The second and third units will be onstream in June and September 2010.

Asian Institute of Management power expert Fernando Y. Roxas cautioned that the Philippines’ future requirements were "guesswork" for now.

"Today, any discussion of numbers of megawatts needed is guesswork because nobody can really predict the level and type of economic activity into the future," he said in an e-mail.

"To make things more complicated, the forecast will need to look out five years into the future because that’s how long it takes to put new major power plants in place," he added.

Underlining the gravity of the problem in the Visayas is the Visayas Supply Augmentation Auction (VSAA) program, under which big power consumers willing to be disconnected from the grid at shortages during peak hours will be paid. Power plants with available capacity during these periods will also be paid for power produced.

The Visayas’ lack of dependable supply reared its head during a 10-hour outage in late April.

Despite the uncertainty, industry players are still optimistic the country will be resilient.
"We shall overcome all of those as we did in the late 1990s ... We have done it before and there is no reason why we cannot do it again. Of course, some industry shake-outs and adjustments will happen in the process," Mr. Alejandro said. — Ava Kashima K. Austria with Marites I. Villamor

this is why...

I gave up my job..there can only be one great writer in the family...

:D

I haven't heard all of his greatness but Ateneans and avid writers say he is good.


"Autobiography" by Arkaye Kierulf

1.

You could say I grew up in a rough neighborhood: We owned boxing gloves. The red ones I loved, which represented fire and strength. I loved how they looked on me. It was rough because my uncle who lived next door was a blackbelter, and we were born with fists. My brother would wear black gloves and my uncle would be the referee of the two of us. When the fighting went on, we would hide love the best way we could. Everyday it was morning. The chickens my other uncle owned — he also lived next door — would flit and putter in their cage as they watched us step into and out of each other. The chickens had feathers so white you'd think heaven was caged with chicken wire. But they were delicious when cooked. Especially with butter, and with much care.

2.

The world is incomplete.

3.

I doubt goodness. For instance, I lost my virginity to a prostitute. My nature is to increase sin, to relegate/buy it with money. I am not capable of committing evil by myself: I need an agent. She was pretending to enjoy it, and I was pretending to enjoy it. We both lied about our age. She had hair down to her hips. I was once, you know, a child.

4.

I will make a list of things I know:
1) A leaf is green.
2) A leaf is black at night.

5.

According to its dual nature, light can also act as a particle. Seeing an object (a chair, table, or person) requires that we move it with the solid particles of light that make sight possible, much the same way that one billiard ball will push another. In other words, we move all objects to some unknown future so we can see their past. (I know this. I was a scientist in my past life.)

Conclusion: Nobody knows what's happening now. The present is a rumor, a story spread by eye.

Said Werner Heisenberg of the subatomic particle: "The more precisely the position is determined, the less precisely the momentum is known in this instant, and vice versa." To illustrate in bigger terms: if you know a white chicken is trapped in your bathroom exactly at the center of your bathtub, then you cannot know exactly how fast or in what direction the chicken is dodging your ax. The second case: if you know a certain girl is drawing away from you radially at a speed of 5 inches per day, then the universe won't allow you to know exactly how far away she already is, or how to find her. (I know this. I was a scientist
in my past life.)

Conclusion: Separation can't be predicted. We cannot know, even by force. We cannot keep.

6.

The history of my body: this little nose I got from my mother, this daffy hair from my father, and my blue eyes I inherited from the sea. The earth bequeathed me brown skin. Look at my feet: tree roots. And my arms: branches. Twenty years ago there was only air where I am. Fifty years from now, air again.

7.

My family is crazy about white dogs. Our first one got ill and died. The second (named Petite) died giving birth. The third (Bingo) ran away. What I really mean: my family is crazy. Mother said Petite couldn't give birth because her babies were too big for her. I think it was because we didn't call a veterinarian. In any case, it was sad. We ate ice cream afterwards. It was delicious. Then it was okay again.

You see, years before he ran away, Bingo was a puppy. Then he got older, and as was our nature, we tried to avoid his ugliness by ignoring him. There was less petting going on, less tail-wagging. And we locked him up in our backyard for three years.

When he ran away, the dogs from all over barked at hm because they didn't know he existed until then. He was always there and nobody knew except us. Everywhere he was lost.

We scoured the streets calling his name. We asked strangers. It was a time when words lost their connections to their referents. I remember sitting at our door-sill, waiting for any shuffle of feet, any bark.

8.

I believe, sometimes, that I am a good man.

9.

I remember
looking at trees.

I remember
Not looking at trees.

10.

In this world there are two types of things that make people happy: the first type pleasures the self directly (e.g., food, sex), while the second pleasures the self only after directing pleasure to others (e.g., clothes, shoes). The first gives solitary joy, the second social. There are exceptions — items that belong to both lists (e.g., beauty) or to none. This is only my observation.

To illustrate beauty: the size of my sex, at rest, is x inches. In the presence of a beautiful woman, longer (beauty elongates matter to fullness). The woman, in turn, now conscious of her erotic effect, will surprise herself with a sudden flush of happiness in the form of two hard
nipples, pink like sunrise.

Another observation: a recluse is selfish with his joy, without care for clothes or shoes.

Another observation: dust collects itself out of nowhere.

11.

The history of my spirit: I don't have a spirit, and borrow only from the air.

12.

The earth accommodates 6,398,649,394 human beings on 148,380,000 square kilometers of land. If these people were spread equally, there'd be a distance of 152.279 meters between each of them, give or take some. This is the average amount of solitude the world allows by distance. When a person dies, everyone in the world is allowed more remove from everyone else. Thus, the resultant sadness. When a person is born, everybody is closer to everybody else.

"I am waiting only for death," said my grandmother one late afternoon in June.

I said to myself: "So this is the world."

Some people are born diabetic: my grandmother hid chocolates in her purse and ate them when nobody was looking. The church, in the person of the priest, visited her every week. And the TV was always on. Once she thought aliens were invading the earth. It was a movie. She was really scared.

I said to myself: "So this is the world."

13.

I will make a list of things I don't know:
1) God's first name
2) The color of a leaf

14.

In 1982 my mother was rivetingly beautiful. She had hair down to her hips. And red lips, too — a cunning innocence. But in the 1970s her pictures were black-and-whites only, and the sky was the color of a lie. I have asked myself many times: How many colors did she need to believe in the world? How many to reproduce beauty? How many so it can last?

15.

Said Gandhi: "If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide."

I will be honest: I am a very funny person sometimes.

16.

In my uncle's backyard where his chickens roamed free, I would search around for eggs. I loved newly laid eggs, especially the little brown ones with white spots. And if I was lucky — they are still warm.

Once I find one I would wrap my fingers around it and close my eyes. It was like holding life in your own — hands-your own life. Then I would put the egg back where I found it, and it was over.

17.

I will be honest: I love the world and I am curiously happy. Nobody knows this because nobody knows. I would tell you about the time I grew my hair past the norm but I don't remember much about it because it never happened. This is another story. The world is incomplete and in a game of poker I lost all of my body-hair to a monkey. I will be honest: the sun is a flashlight and some divine idiot is checking on us once in a while in this eternal blackout. Watch out for me, my brothers! Before the next war I will be smug in my coffin wearing formal attire. I have been known, you know, to dress up extravagantly for such grand occasions.

The Spa

IN line with my life cleansing and zen mode which starts today...my dad and I tried the treatments in The Spa in Trinoma.

I got the Aroma Scalp and Shoulder Massage and he got the Aroma Facial Massage which costs P850 each if you're a non-member.

The place is safari-themed. The ginger tea given before and after the massage (optional) tasted good and far from the ginger you know as a spice.

What I also like about the place is the privacy it offers to customers. Except in the massage area, the facial, and other stuff are for two's. There is also an option to avail of the executive suite.

The scalp and shoulder massage was good. My first choice of treatment was the Indian head massage since I'm in dire need to straighthen up my chakras, however the Indian oil smells a little different and I don't want to walk in the mall smelling like that, maybe next time in a different branch.

I actually felt weird since I don't really get massages coz it somehow makes me more stressed and causes afterpains, I can feel my veins in different directions now and I don't know if that's good, but I felt destressed (why didn't I think of this when I was still working?). But, I should really stick to the scrubs, hehehe. The oil however was good for my hair (damn, that oil can tame wild locks).

My dad said the facial was ok and he can avail of it for a cheaper price.

downside: there's no dry changing room area. (one only)

I think we'll do this spa thing once a month from now on. :D

The Spa website

medical mission - Bataan (May 24)

5. moments to do some goodwill to mankind...(I know my being alive is just not enough..ahaha..)

scandal

On the current sex video scandal involving some personalities:

I think more than the sympathy...not watching the video would also help...am I right?
let's give the girls some dignity people.

tsk tsk.

TRY: flea market in Bangkal, Makati

from Carlos Celdran's blog

DO-IT-YOURSELF TOUR!
EVANGELISTA QUE LINDA!
Window shopping through the flea markets of one of Manila's emerging neighborhoods of cool: Bangkal, Makati
FREE
Dates:
ANYTIME EXCEPT SUNDAYS
Fat Michael's is located at 1354 Gen Lacuna St. Bangkal Makati.
(turn right at Makati Apartelle from southbound lane of South Super Hiway before the Magallanes Interchange).
Call Fat Michael's Place Tel.8442638 or 8431953 for directions to
their restaurant and for the free map. Ask for Jude Mancuyas
I highly recommend their food. Simple slow fare. Not a greasy spoon at all.

KaEskwela

KaEskwela is a group of old and new friends who have come together to extend whatever help we can give to public schoolchildren.

We are always looking for more people who are willing to give time and exert effort to help Filipino kids. If you want to join us, send a blank email to brigadaeskwela-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

But, you don't need to be a member of the group to donate. We accept books (old or new, reference books, storybooks / fiction, textbooks), school bags, shoes, uniform, school supplies, educational vcds, visual aids, flash cards, computers and cash donations. Just email kaeskwelavolunteers@yahoo.com to make arrangements on how we can get the donations. We assure you that all turnovers of donations are documented, and you will be sent photos of the schools accepting the donations, or acknowledgment letters from school officials.

Please note that we are NOT connected with the Brigada Eskwela program of the Department of Education, a project for the physical maintenance of public schools.

-from Facebook

website

good morning shot

in the works

I have high hopes for my third work...but I still have to find the material I have in mind...



This would look way way different when finished...

few shots while at work...

pesto pasta

ingredients:

noodles, pesto, extra virgin oil (forgot the brands but all from Santi's Delicatessen)
any cheese (grated)
Maggi Magic Sarap


1. Cook the noodles to a boil in salted water.
2. mix the virgin oil, pesto and Maggi magic sarap
3. pour sauce on noodles. Grate cheese on top.
4. Heat in microwave to make the flavor blend (about a minute).

what's up with the world

Got this from Global Development Briefing's newsletter..

India

"I'm feeling bad. I'm thinking about where to sleep."

-- Rubina Ali, the 9-year-old girl who starred in the film "Slumdog Millionaire" as she tried to salvage twisted metal and splintered wood -- all that remained of her bubble-gum pink home after Indian authorities demolished part of a city slum where she lived. Months after their movie swept the Oscars, Ali and Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail, 10, are both sleeping on hard dirt, wondering when they too might go from slumdog to millionaire, the Associated Press reported. Azharuddin's home was demolished last week. The demolitions took place because the slum houses were in the way of a planned pedestrian overpass, said a railway official who refused to be named. Such demolitions are common in India's chaotic cities. "It's best that I move," said Rubina's father, carpenter Rafiq Qureshi, who built the home seven years ago with USD 2,000, adding that the filmmakers are helping find the family a new home. "They are doing what they promised," he said. Destroyed shanties often resurface and temporary homes had already sprung up around Azhar's house, AP said, where his family tied blankets and blue and yellow tarpaulins to a wooden frame for shelter. Some neighbors had taken out fresh loans from local moneylenders to rebuild, at 20 percent interest a month.


picture from www.entekhabnews.net
Global Development Briefing -- Home Sweet Home

Kuwait

Some great news for women in the conservative Persian Gulf: Kuwaitis elected their first-ever women lawmakers to parliament. Voters in four districts elevated women into parliamentary jobs. It's believed to be the first time women have been elected to serve as lawmakers in any of the oil-rich Gulf monarchies. Kuwaiti women were only granted the right to vote in 2005."It's a victory for Kuwaiti women and a victory for Kuwaiti democracy," lawmaker Aseel Awadhi, a philosophy professor, said after winning a seat. Sunni Islamists lost half their seats mainly to Shi'ite Muslim and liberal candidates in what could signal a power shift. (LA Times)

newly elected women lawmakers

Ireland

Priests beat and raped children during decades of abuse in Catholic-run institutions in Ireland, an official report said May 20, but it stopped short of naming the perpetrators. Orphanages and industrial schools in 20th century Ireland were places of fear, neglect and endemic sexual abuse, the Commission to Inquire into Child Abuse said in a five-volume report that took nine years to compile. The Commission blasted successive generations of priests, nuns and Christian Brothers for beating, starving and, in some cases raping, children in Ireland's now defunct network of industrial and reformatory schools from the 1930s onwards. (Reuters)

Japan

Japan's economy contracted by a 15.2 percent annual pace in the first quarter . its sharpest drop on record . as exports plunged, companies slashed production and families cut back on spending, the government said May 20. But the outlook is hopeful. Economists say the world's second-largest economy is most likely past the worst, and some predicted it would grow again in the April-June quarter amid signs of recovering factory output and aggressive stimulus steps by the government. "I think the economy has passed the bottom and the recovery has begun in the current quarter," said Richard Jerram, chief economist at Macquarie Capital Securities in Tokyo. (AP)

Haiti

Former US President Bill Clinton has been named by the UN as its special envoy to Haiti, to boost social and economic recovery in the Caribbean island. Clinton said he was honored to accept the position. He said he would work to help Haiti rebuild after last year's tropical storms which killed nearly 800 people and caused USD 1 billion in damage. Clinton helped raise funds for Haiti recently, and is seen as having an enduring interest in the country. Meanwhile, the challenge facing Haiti of achieving stability and economic recovery remains great, especially after a year of damaging setbacks, but the impoverished nation has seen significant progress in the last two years, the head of a UN team that visited the country said May 14. (BBC)

United States

hybrid car, Toyota Prius (picture from www.ecobusinesslinks.com)

US President Barack Obama has announced tough targets for new fuel-efficient vehicles in order to cut pollution and lower dependence on oil imports. Describing the move as "historic," Obama said the country's first-ever national standards would reduce vehicle emissions by about a third by 2016. The plan aims to replace overlapping rules on emissions and efficiency set by federal agencies and states. US carmakers and environmental groups have expressed support for the move. Under the proposed standards, manufacturers would be required to begin improving fuel efficiency by 5 percent a year from 2012. (BBC)

Venezuela

Venezuelan lawmakers are studying whether to limit profit margins on consumer goods in a bid to keep down the cost of living, said Simon Escalona, a deputy in President Hugo Chavez's socialist party. A proposal under consideration by the National Assembly.s finance committee would limit profit on .primary needs. items, including rice and sugar, to between 3 percent and 4 percent, Escalona said, with any excess profit taken by the government. .We need to punish speculation,. Escalona said after a committee meeting. .Caracas became the world's most expensive city because some unscrupulous business people want to make more money.. (Bloomberg)


The biggest new displacement in the world until recently was in the Philippines, where 600,000 people fled fighting between the government and rebel groups in the southern region of Mindanao.


troops in Mindanao (BBC)

Now it's Pakistan, with the displacement brought on by fighting in the north-west region between government forces and the Taliban militia. International agency Oxfam said May 20 that it has had to double its aid effort in Pakistan as the number of displaced goes over 2 million, making the crisis the greatest internal displacement of people in the country's history.

now that's a life

My friend shared this link to me when I came for a visit.

http://cheryldiazmeyer.com

surprising new find

Now that I'm officially relieved from any obligation from my previous company, or so I think...yahooo!!... I suddenly had this newfound excitement for studying again...

I actually tell people that I'll never set foot in a classroom again coz I think I have an ADHD or something...

I'm gonna study as much as I can from now on. hohoho! I still have miscellaneous courses lined up and calling for my much needed action.

I just hope I get to do them all...

June would be funtabulous with my relatives going home from US...yey! Planning a getaway for my Centrum gang as well. (I do hope they get their leaves...), getaway with my ex-officemates and forever friends, plus the much needed dinner with DD! (ehem, hahaha).

AND KRIS ALLEN WON AMERICAN IDOL! YAHOOO!

Giving up another piece of the past

I got a weird text message from a friend last week saying that our school was already sold to the owners of the nearby mall. I have yet to prove that rumor but it feels weird that all our good memories will now be under whatever new establishment would soon rise there.

I actually regret going to that school academically, since I felt like it didn't really stimulate my brain cells well enough all the time. But experience wise, I met interesting people and gained unforgettable moments.

In that place, I become a normal student for a change(I had a sorta bibo childhood phase, which is another story for another time), I became a one-time bigtime band vocalist (which is still a sakit sa bangs moment if I recall it), a sorta badminton player (who never got to play legally, just during practices), a class treasurer, an occasional "stalkee" (haha), and an unwilling "muse" who was described as a curly haired girl but sported a straightened hair during prom night(that was funny really), and I wouldn't trade those moments for anything else despite the horror really, except at some point when I realize that my English started deteriorating that time.

This definitely says that life is indeed changing...and no matter how much we want to hold on to the past, we can't... so as Limp Bizkit's song says "keep rollin rollin rollin rollin.."

update on the rumor soon...

Silent movement

Getting back on track (meaning watching news on TV again) I saw a news bit on a group that made a new movement, the Silent Movement. They vowed to vote wisely while not hopping on the stereotypical political fiasco that is Philippine politicking.

I for one believe in the power of silence in times of crisis. A problem is solved when you do it without bantering.

However, silence can also mean apathy. Rather than getting involved, you stay silent letting louder people brainwash other minds.

So how do we make sure that people would do their part despite the silence?
We just pray and trust, no matter how hard that is.

what now?

what do you know, I'm awake again and its 4am...I'm becoming a graveyard person... anyhow... random thoughts

Finally, my last focus story is out...so I don't have anything more to think about, but I have yet to submit my requirements for clearance later...if I get up early enough...what a huge relief! Thank You Lord!

My main worry at the moment is what now?

I haven't really gotten to the part of looking for the next job since I'm still focused on completing my requirements from my previous work. My logic was I don't want to enter something new when I'm still not finished from my previous work, the same reason why I didn't bother looking for a job despite knowing that I would leave soon. It's just surreal since I give all my time to what I'm doing that it won't make sense and its too exhausting. When I entered my previous company, my boss asked one thing from me, commitment to my work and I did just that. When you are committed, you do not look around, prancing about for new opportunities, you stick to what you have until you get it done. People would have wanted me to be pirated by other companies or look for other options while idling away, and I understand that for practicality... but I need a clean slate, not a quick getaway.


What now?

Now that i'm almost out... I'm actually much more confused but I have this vague career path in my head.

Not to mention the hard time of facing people nowadays answering perennial post resignation questions like "where are you working now?" or "what's new?". I do appreciate the concern but sometimes, it gets too overwhelming, so please understand that this is sort of a hibernation mode for me...its never easy to think about your life plan let alone be exposed to the same old environment when you want to break out of it.

I also have bullet points to guide me.

*A five-day, 8-hour job - Having flexible time before was a big advantage but I figured, It's not really as liberating as I managed it. I just want to have that feeling that when I step out of the office I am no longer working like everybody else. And also I want to go home at peace without traumatizing calls and texts.
* A Saturday and a Sunday off - I want to study and spend time with my family during weekends where I am not only physically but also emotionally and mentally around.
* non-working holidays - I want to experience long weekends, every bit of it, even though I don't get paid double.
* a salary I can live with - fair enough to still be able to support my getaways and my hobbies and for spoiling people once in a while.
* perks and benefits - I hope its as generous as my previous job.
* an environment I can grow in and learn more and I get to meet all kinds of people.
* won't give me much "heartburn" - after learning that I have MVP, I value my health more already coz I haven't done much daredevil acts for this lifetime, I want to and I have to be healthy for that.

With that, here's my plan:

I want to enter foreign service ever since college and I'm trying to get into that first...I still don't know if I'm suited for it and if it still makes sense going for it after failing FSO last year, but I do hope like surprisingly having been a news writer despite the much needed background, I'll be able to ride that "wave" soon (banking too much on confidence and willpower here).

Plan B is advertising, C is anything art related. Plan D is still media but more on the lighter side of life: arts and travel.

However, as much as possible, I'm gonna steer clear from any work that would require me to write to my wits' end, not until I get my groove back coz I seriously drained all my brain cells the last time.

While I'm looking for my potential job I'll stay in hopefully more than a year, I'm thinking of studying any language, driving, and photography while having a sideline to pay for my bills and for my parents' comfort. If I'm lucky enough, I'd probably get into a business.

I vowed to repair my life until I'm 25 and that's two years from now. I really can't do a long term thing coz I'm such a spontaneous person, but hopefully, my outright decisions once in a while would still get me to where I want to be a few years from now. By then I should be in a sort of "dream job" and I should have caused a step up for most of my passions.

Also next year, my mom's going to retire already so I want to put up a business with her and my dad so they'll both have something worthwhile to do, alongside leisure hopefully.

A sort of a long term would probably this: I remembered my sister said that a person should have made his or her first million before hitting 30 years old, otherwise, he or she won't make a million for the rest of his or her life anymore. I know for some that's stupid but I'm also factoring that in... Before thirty I should have made a million pesos or whatever currency, a million smiles, a million good deeds and a million experiences.

But above all, I leave everything to God and I really pray that my dreams make sense and that He would agree that it is the right thing for me. Of course I understand that along the way, things will change and I may or may not get the life I'm trying to shape...However, whatever He thinks is right, He will give and I trust Him enough for that. I'll get there... (and you too, if you share the same principle)
So Lord, lead me wherever You feel is right.

There's really a whole new and big world out there...and I can't wait to get out again. "Thoughts to Things" mode forever! :D

Smile for a Cause

Donate a smile for the benefit of UNICEF

With the introduction of Smile Shutter™ technology on Sony Ericsson Cyber-shot phones, Sony Ericsson brings everyone a unique opportunity to smile for an important cause. Sony Ericsson embarks on a campaign to collect a million smile photos to raise a million pesos for UNICEF, and spread the smiles all over the Philippines, if not to all corners of the globe.

One million photos collected through Smile Booths in selected SM Malls, in Smiles Zones in Sony Ericsson Experience Shops, and through smiles4unicefphils@gmail.com would earn UNICEF P1 million pesos.

Additionally, for a P20 donation, a donor will be entitled to a Digiprint photo printout, a spot on the Smile Wall, and a raffle ticket to win a Sony Ericsson C510 Cyber-shot phone.

By simply smiling, you can spread the smiles and raise a million for our children from now until June 30, 2009.


Donating a smile

There are three venues for your smile donations to Spread The Smiles:

Sony Ericsson Experience Shops – Try new Sony Ericsson phones in shops across the country and say cheese at the shop’s Smile Zone. Get a good look and feel for the latest Sony Ericsson handsets, get a demonstration of Smile Shutter and other amazing imaging features. Then strike a pose and smile for a cause.

Sony Ericsson Experience Shops are located in:

Cyberzone, SM City North EDSA
Cyberzone, SM Megamall
SM Mall of Asia
Robinsons Galleria
Robinsons’ Place Ermita, Manila
Greenbelt 1, Makati
Digital Exchange, Glorietta 3
Trinoma Mall
Ayala Center , Cebu
Cyberzone, SM City Cebu
SM Pampanga, Angeles City
Gaisano Mall, Davao City
NCCC Mall, Davao City
Limketkai Mall, Cagayan de Oro City
SM Marikina
SM City Bacolod
SM City Davao

Smile Booths at SM Malls – Visit a participating SM Mall on selected dates and check out the Smile Booths. Nine SM Malls will feature a Smile Booth where you can have your smiles captured with Sony Ericsson phones. A PhP 20 donation will get you a Digiprint copy while you wait, a spot on the Smile Wall, and a raffle coupon to win the new Sony Ericsson C510 Cyber-shot phone.

Smile Booths at SM Malls will be located in:

SM North EDSA (The Block) – May 13 to May 31, 2009
SM Mall of Asia - May 14 to May 27, 2009
SM Megamall (Building A) - May 15 to May 31, 2009
SM Cebu - June 2 to June 7, 2009
SM Davao - June 2 to June 7, 2009
SM Iloilo - June 2 to June 7, 2009
SM Pampanga - June 9 to June 15, 2009
SM Baguio - June 9 to June 15, 2009
SM Manila - June 9 to June 15, 2009

Email – You may donate smiles to smiles4unicefphils@gmail.com. Upload your digital smile photos and tell us a little about the smiles behind them. Invite friends and family to be part of the Smile Squad and give a smile for the children.


Smile Walls

Smile Walls will be in Sony Ericsson Experience Shops and in Smile Booths at SM Malls.A giant Smile Wall will rise at the SM North EDSA Sky Garden Bridgeway that will show the smiles collected from all over the country.

Help raise a million smile photos to raise a million pesos for our children.

-obtained from facebook

insomnia strikes

I can't sleep due to sickness... so I'll just answer this "for adults only" survey in facebook let's see how serious this can get...

tired of all of those surveys made up by high school kids? here are questions for the people who are a little older...

1. what bill do you hate paying the most? – I actually enjoy paying bills, it makes me feel more responsible. (I really don't care about money if I have...if I don't I'll care a little..ahaha)

2. do you miss being a child? – actually, now that I think about it, no.

3. chore you hate the most? – hanging clothes to dry.gawd...

4.where was the last place you had a romantic dinner? – probably just intimate...and I still can't remember...

5. if you could go back and change one thing what would it be? – Most of the time I think of changing some decisions I had, but when I evaluate things now, I think it was meant to happen...I deserve everything, every hurt and joy.

6. name of your first grade teacher? – ms. llaneta

7. what do you really want to be doing right now? – I actually want to sleep already its 3:30 am and I know after some years my insomnia days will get the best of me.

8. what did you want to be when you were growing up? - I wanted to be a scientist then an artist, and then a lot of things... but what I really want to be is a good person who can cause a good change once in a while, whatever job I have.

9. what was your post secondary education? – BA Development Studies

10. why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now? – its comfy.

11. what are your thoughts on gas prices? – i havent really read anything oil related recently due to my debriefing mode...but as oil companies say its a deregulated environment and the rise of oil prices are just a reflection of efforts to revive the economy. It's actually hard to say what's a fair price since its a business too so I think they do deserve some profit too. I think I'll be able to understand the sentiments of consumers when I pay for gas or diesel already.

12. first thought when the alarm went off this morning? – that's the good thing, I don't think about anything these past few days, I should in the coming days though.

13. last thought before going to sleep last night? – I wonder if I can have a wedding like Juday and Ryan's.

14. which famous person would you like to have dinner with? – Bono or Ellen (that would be hilarious).

15. have you ever crashed your vehicle? - maybe, we'll see...but I hope not.

16. if you didn't have to work, would you volunteer? – yes!

17. get up early or sleep in? – get up early

18. what is your favorite cartoon or children's tv show character? – little lulu

19. favorite thing to do at night? – soundtrip

20. when did you first start feeling old? - when I left my job in the midst of a recession, before...not doing anything is accepted since I'm still in school, but now, I feel guilty.

21. favorite lunch meat? – anything

22. what do you get every time you go into wal-mart? – I hate groceries.

23. do you think marriage is an outdated ritual? – nope

24. favorite movie you wouldn't want anyone to find out that you watch over and over and over? - any cartoon flick

24a. favorite movie(s)? – so many

25. what's your favorite drink? – water

26. who[m] from high school would you like to run in to? - anyone from school but I do hope my fourth year classmates and high school friends...havent seen them for ages

27. what radio station are you tuned into? – dzmm

27a what do you listen to in your car? – I usually have my player with me so I have my own tunes.

28. sopranos or desperate housewives? - desperate housewives

28a. favorite television series? - gossip girl

29. favorite musical? - the ballet musical of Darna we watched before in CCP

30. worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back? - being too insensitive to others and not expressing my feelings, which in turn makes me take people for granted unintentionally...to name a few, but I do hope I'm way away from that...

31. do you like the person who sits directly across from you at work? - before? everyone's ok with me.

31a. how well do you get along with your coworkers? – good, we cheer each other to boost our ailing morales.

32. have you ever had to use a fire extinguisher or fire hose for its intended purposes? – haven't

33. last book you finished reading? – For One More Day

34. do you have a teddy bear? – gave it all away

35. strangest place you have ever brushed your teeth? - what?

36. do you go to a church? - I actually do but not to hear mass though just for a "chat" with God

37. how old are you? - 23

38. do you like where you live? – I actually want to move out of this place its too relaxed..ahaha

38a. where would you ideally like to live? – my dream is in Portofino in Alabang (nice italian villa..oh yeah) but The Fort or somewhere in Ortigas would probably be ok too or somewhere along Edsa.

39. how do you let someone know you`re not interested? – I do it nicely.

40. how do you let someone know you are interested? –I do something out of the ordinary

It is quite serious, except for some questions...

gagawa na tayo ng paraan

kung ayaw may dahilan, kung gusto parating merong paraan...gumawa na lang tayo ng paraan.

- Antukin by Rico Blanco

sa dinami daming kamalian, natuto na maging maparaan, wala nang ayawan.peksman.

"thoughts to things" mode on

from Bo's blog

The Two Things You Need To Be Successful

You can’t be successful in life without these two essential things:

Giftedness and Godliness.

Let me define them for you.

Giftedness is the ability to turn thought into things;

Godliness is the ability to use that giftedness to serve.

Giftedness is being like God in his skills;

Godliness is being like God in his service.

Giftedness is being like God in his power;

Godliness is being like God in his love.

Giftedness is charisma; Godliness is character.

You can be successful with giftedness alone, but success will be short-lived and isolated in one or two areas of your life. For real success that spans your whole life, you need giftedness and godliness.

-BO SANCHEZ

maybe this is the reason why I feel excited despite turning away from a good job a month ago...I know I'm meant to do things in a way much more suitable for me,hopefully...

chain

From hearing to singing...

Broken Strings - James Morrison (Feat. Nelly Furtado)

Let me hold you
For the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me
Now I can't feel anything

When I love you
It's so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking
It's the voice of someone else

Oh it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that aint real

Oh the truth hurts
And lies worse
I can't like it anymore
And I love you a little less than before

Oh what are we doing
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us

Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When it's too late

Oh it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that aint real

Oh the truth hurts
And lies worse
I can't like it anymore
And I love you a little less than before

But we're running through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When we both know it's too late

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that aint real

Oh the truth hurts
And lies worse
I can't like it anymore
And I love you a little less than before
Oh and I love you a little less than before

Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last change to feel again

Pahiyas

Bucket List
* attend at least one local festival

May 15 was Pahiyas Day for me and my dad.

We opted to to take a bus (Jam Liner in Cubao) bound to Lucena in Quezon and a huge jeepney to get to the town of Lucban (I read that traffic during Pahiyas is the worst and that would have been hell for driving so during that moments, leave it to the bus driver).

I have to say it's like the longest roadtrip I had after a while (nothing beat's all-dayer Ilocos). Fares cost P218 each for the bus, P30 each for the jeepney. The trip lasted for three hours, thank gawd for the early morning view of Mt. Makiling and Banahaw.

Lucban is a quiet little town. It feels weird that the houses were small but it doesn't feel crowded at all like Vigan.

I must have missed all the festivities (we got out of Manila around 5:30 am or 6am, I suggest a much earlier departure) coz we only got to see the decorated houses.




We also tried the Pansit Lucban or popularly called "habhab" which you must eat without utensils. Killing the experience though, my dad got too excited and ordered one in Mustiola's, an old style restaurant, instead of the cheaper version on the street which was only P7 for each order. Mustiola's version costs P70 but good for at least 4 people.

Also a must try is Lucban's longganisa, I find it much better than Vigan's.



small variety sells for P65 while the big ones sell for around P130 (I don't know if that's per kilo though..)

A P30 ride on a tricycle also got us to Kamay ni Hesus Healing Center.



It's like a grotto (it probably is). We wanted to go up the huge Jesus Christ Statue but my dad and I both have vertigo, and there won't be anyone to save us, so we just stayed on the ground.

Going home was the worst, since SLEX= heavy and I mean HEAVY traffic and for that I'm so loving living in the North. It took us four hours plus the bus kept stopping.

But I must say, I'll come back again and visit other sites in Quezon (Viaje del Sol anyone?)

PAHIYAS PICTURES

It's good to know

that there is also another person who thinks she'll grow old and alone but not without partying all the way to her prime years.

Cheers to Kat Von D!



- I however am not sure what year was the LA Ink I saw when she said that, she might have a change of heart by now (read she's dating Nikki Sixx of the Motley Crue).

and guys, please let me and Kat savor that thought as good as it lasts...its the thought that counts after all... haha

what's up last week

For One More Day

Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought they would be here forever? If so then you can go your whole life collecting days and none will outweigh the one you wish you had back.

What if you got it back?

In time for Mother's Day (May 10), I read Mitch Albom's For One More Day.



The story is about a son who had an accident and a near-death experience which was able to give him another chance to make amends with his mother,who died earlier, and will help his own family as well.

Chick Benetto was a product of a broken family and a patriarchal society. Being a guy, he worked so hard to please his father despite the fact that the latter abandoned them. The way he went out of his way to please his father, to the expense of his mother, Posey, and his own family will make you realize that sometimes or oftentimes we take for granted things we already have since we hold on tight to the things we think we will lose or those wealready lost but trying hard to regain.

It also showed how separated women at that time (50's) handled the pressure from society (for men its an opportunity, for women, fellow women who are separated are a threat).

I only heard of near-death experiences with some dead loved one "picking up" their dying relatives. Mr. Albom's approach to that possibility was more than the blinding light mode. It was as if Posey came back to life to help Chick and as if Chick was invincible despite his many wounds from the car accident and water tower jump which he somehow miraculously survived.

I would love to give a synopsis but I believe the story is a giveaway already that in the end, Chuck will live and will be able to restore his life thanks to that one day with his mom.

Music:

I have recently dug the soundtrack of the computer game Beach Life. It's like Sims but you'll have to manage a resort or island or something, I forgot. Anyhow, the music is great for reading (I like to read with instrumental music on the background, it makes me more focused) and clearing your mind.

Viva Lasagna (Pizza Hut)
Pizza Hut's attempt to have the pizza and lasagna in one bite (Viva Lasagna) failed. It doesn't have that lasagna feel. Garfield will definitely not approve.

Go Kris

I never really rooted for anyone whenever I get to watch American Idol since it won't matter coz I'm not an American. Anyhow, I have to admit that thought was history when I saw Kris Allen perform Kanye West's Heartless.



I adore Kanye and I love Heartless and the animated video. But Kris' version is just breathtaking.

Heartless - Kris Allen

Mr. West's version for comparison

Heartless (Remastered) - Kanye West

I want him to win, I've had it with Adam's screamo style.

painting 002

It would be so predictable to call this one gumamela so I'm naming this

Faith, Hope and Love disguised
oil on canvas

biggest blunders

Since I know in a few years I'll have a worse memory... I have to blog this...
Coz nobody's perfect..and yes people are crazy.

Anecdote number 1
The monkey scratch

When I was still a kid (in Kinder 2..probably 4 years old), my mom was into selling Tupperwares (it was like a fad back then). We were in a "Tupperware warehouse" and since the line was so long I decided to wait in the car. The place had a monkey tied in a tree. I was so fascinated with it that I didn't settle in just watching it from inside the car, so I went out. I was looking for my parents to show them the monkey but to my horror I saw the monkey scratching my arm. I didnt feel it the first time since its like a normal scratch but my right arm (thank gawd, coz I'm a leftie) was full of wounds after. I had to use sebo de macho and had to cover my right arm with a hanky coz my arm was just horrifying to look at. I never approached a monkey ever after that (but I still love bananas).


Anecdote 2
UP Bias

I was one of the organizers of a concert back in college. I was in charge of contacting possible performers. A lot of upcoming bands were flooding the market at that time one of them is Up Dharma Down (UDD). I didn't know UDD back then, it was before Maybe even became a hit. I called up the manager of Terno Recordings and asked for their package. He called me up and I was asking about the bands...

me: so sino po yung mga bands niyo UP Dharma Down? (as UP - University of the Philippines)blak blah blah...

manager: uhm its Up not UP

me: ow...kei.. (pahiya to pieces)


Anecdote 3
Hate Late

One day, I had to take my entrance exam in UST, but I must attend a burial in the morning.Thinking I'll make the 1pm exam, I still went to the burial. I was however late for the exam, and my charms didn't work with the one in charge, so I had to reschedule my exam, better than not being able to take it right. (Good thing coz my second proctor was way cute bwahaha).

chiilll

I've had it with waiting...I have this rule that I will refrain from socializing with people until I get my clearance from my previous work since I want to end that chapter in my life and I want to start a new chapter totally in tabula rasa (clean slate). Unfortunately, I have been waiting for a month, and it doesn't seem to end so, the hell with that rule, my world should not stop just because of it (thanks for the kind words friends).

I was also motivated since I read a few chapters of Malcolm Gladwell's Tipping Point and a blog entry of my favorite Bo Sanchez (click here)

I have always resorted to alone time whenever I feel down. Unlike some people who party, drink or watch a movie or do something to get their mind off things, I choose to stare at nothingness. I stare and stare and think and think until I solve the problem coz I don't want to bother people about my depression and vice versa (which probably explains my "I can survive alone" attitude -- I've had people in my life not worthy enough of my trust...but that's another story, right).

After a thousand times of wall staring, I realized that I'd rather waste my energy and time with people no matter how imperfect they are...coz that should be the way to go. :D

so here's my tentative sked for the month aside from painting...


chiilll time

May 9 or 10?- Mother's day
May 14 - Bananz birthday
May 15 - Pahiyas
May 16 - weighing between Bataan outreach or European thingie or dinner with my House buddies
May 23 - MG Day
May ?= whenever I feel like it - The Spa

power hug

I read or heard (I can't remember) that for a person to be emotionally stable everyday, he or she should be hugged 18 times a day...

I just remembered that thought since I'm liking this song:

Gusto Ko Lamang Sa Buhay - Itchyworms

Ayokong maghintay pa sa imposible
Ayoko ng mga romatikong sine
Ayoko nang umasa pa sa walang silbi

Ayokong tumawid pag pinagbabawal
Ayoko ng kapeng maraming asukal
Ayokong bumili ng underwear na mahal

Chorus:
Gusto ko lamang sa buhay ay yakapin mo ako
Gusto ko lamang sa buhay ay yakapin mo ako
Hindi naman ako milyonaryo
Basta't araw-araw yakap mo ko
Feeling ko ang yaman yaman ko

Ok lang kung 'di maging presidente
Ok lang kung mawalan ng kuryente
Ok lang kung ang bumbilya'y walang sindi

Ok lang kung ketchup lamang ang ulam
Ang gulay ay hindi naman kailangan
Basta't sa sandwich mo ako ang iyong palaman

Chorus:
Gusto ko lamang sa buhay ay yakapin mo ako
Gusto ko lamang sa buhay ay yakapin mo ako

Hindi naman ako milyonaryo
Basta't araw-araw yakap mo ko
Feeling ko ang yaman yaman ko
Feeling ko ang yaman yaman ko

Bridge:

Ang dami ko pang sinabi
Tungkol sa aking sarili
Lahat ng yun 'di na bale
Ikaw lang ang importante

Yakapin mo ako
Lunurin sa iyo
Sa loob ng 'yong mga bisig
Dama ko ang 'yong pag-ibig

Yakapin mo ako
Gusto ko lamang sa buhay ay yakapin mo ako...

[Repeat Chorus]

NOW GO HUG SOMEONE OR BE HUGGED! :D